Stop Worrying
Learn To Accept Uncertainty And Stay In The Moment
by Eric Elkin
This morning I googled the word, “worry.” The search produced a litany of books on the topic. Actually, it was an endless list of resources ranging from children’s books to advanced academic studies. The most fascinating thing was discovering the creative way authors titled their books. Each one was a variation on the same theme, stop worrying.
On the Psychology Today website, Dr. Graham Davey offers “10 Tips to Manage Your Worrying”. In his professional opinion,“Worrying is normally a very inefficient attempt to problem-solve.” I assume since he is a doctor endorsed by Psychology Today this is more than an opinion. It is a well-studied fact about worrying. Not only is worrying not efficient, but it is also unhealthy.
With so much information about the dangers of worrying and help on how to stop, why do we continue to worry?
On the Psychology Today website, Dr. Graham Davey offers “10 Tips to Manage Your Worrying”. In his professional opinion,“Worrying is normally a very inefficient attempt to problem-solve.” I assume since he is a doctor endorsed by Psychology Today this is more than an opinion. It is a well-studied fact about worrying. Not only is worrying not efficient, but it is also unhealthy.
With so much information about the dangers of worrying and help on how to stop, why do we continue to worry?
On another Psychology Today post, Dr. Seth Gillihan, offers his expert advice on why we worry. His insights are a helpful guide for a pastor with a short attention span and need of an immediate answer. Gillihan offers five reasons we worry:
If I worry, I'll never have a bad surprise. Worrying prepares ourselves for bad surprises. We use it “to preempt disappointment.”
It is safer to worry. In our minds, we think to worry “lowers the likelihood of a dreaded outcome.”
I show I care by worrying. We fool ourselves into thinking worrying is an expression of love.
Worrying motivates me. The person who believes this way actually fears to be complacent or unproductive.
Worrying helps me solve problems. If you feel this way, please refer back to the previously cited wisdom of Dr. Davey.
Looking over this list, I am definitely a #5 type of person. Although, I do have a tendency to embrace #4 as well. #3 is not really my issue. For example, I do not worry about my children as an expression of love. My love for my children produces a fear for their well being that rests in my head from the time I wake up until that moment right before I wake up.
The two most consistent professional suggestions to manage our worry involved learning to accept uncertainty and staying in the moment. As I read the scripture reading for this day, I find both of these recommendations in the text. Not that I need Jesus as my psychologist, but it gives the words depth to my soul.
So much of our story with God is God trying to convince us we will be taken care of, no matter what happens. The characters in the Bible endure some of the most horrible tragedies, yet God is always there comforting and sustaining the wounded. Our own worry often stands in the way of believing and embracing this truth.
No matter who is speaking and what wisdom they are drawing from, these things remain true. We are not promised tomorrow, but we are granted today. Today does not give us the power to undo yesterday, nor does it provide us list of tomorrows problem. No problem can be addressed entirely until it appears. So let us live in this day and enjoy it as a special gift. Not a gift wrapped in paper, but present overwhelmed in love.
Click to read: Matthew 6: 25-34
Reflection Questions:
What worry are you holding onto today?
How can you let go of this worry?
Where do you need to hear a promise of life beyond your own eyes?
What are you thankful for this day?