Popes, Pastors, And People Desire Permission To Forgive Themselves

by Eric Elkin

“You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.”

— Matthew 5:5 (The Message)

My Sunday was consumed with the news of Kobe Bryant’s death. I’m sure many of you felt the same way. Some dark desire had taken over my mind. I needed to know everything. What happened; how did it happen, and who was involved. The constant coverage of news broadcasts added very little new information. Yet, when I set my phone down, all I could think about was what I was missing. By the end of the day, I needed a break.

Sunday night popcorn and a movie was the perfect distraction. Peg and I finally decided to watch the Netflix movie, “The Two Popes.” For the longest time, it felt like a movie we “should” watch, but neither of us could commit. Finally, as positive reviews emerged from critics and friends, we changed our minds. Little did I know, the movie would tend to a fracture in my soul. It was a fracture that needed attention.

If you have not seen the movie, it explores the relationship between Pope Benedict XVI and Pope Francis. They were two men who had little in common. Yet, they were bound together by a unique experience in papal history, a resignation. On February 28, 2013, Pope Benedict XVI resigned. The first pope to resign in over 600 years.

“God has a plan for how to start anew…In those places and times of hardship, it seems appropriate to think about the newness and change and hope that comes when God takes twigs and makes cedars.”

— Tyler Mayfield

Few laypeople in the church understand the dynamics of being ordained. Many people think a person becomes a pastor because they are good. This is not true. They see clergy as judgmental. Yet, they will rarely acknowledge their own judgment of clergy. Something I learned even before entering seminary, pastors fear vulnerability. The people they most fear being vulnerable to are colleagues.

Knowing and experiencing these truths made the movie powerful to me. I appreciated how it delved into the depths of these two pastors’ spiritual journeys. Each spoke about their call to ministry. They opened up about their failures, judgments, and the burden of their own sins. Ultimately, we get to see the two men embrace forgiveness, mercy, and compassion.

For the two popes, though, forgiveness was not solely an external event. Forgiveness as an external event, to me, is when one person seeks forgiveness from another. Here, in this movie, I felt the two popes most desired permission to forgive themselves. Forgiveness declared carries little power until it is embraced by the receiving heart.

Bono, the lead singer of U2, once described the songs he wrote as letters. The letters were words that he wanted to share with others. One song, he and the Edge wrote for their daughters. When it was done, they realized the message was for themselves. Summing it up, Bono said, “We preach what we need to hear.” I thought this a good lesson to remember every time you either preach or listen to a sermon.

I don’t need God to declare what I have done wrong or how I have hurt someone. Those voices come from people all around me. And, it would appear there is no shortage of them. What I need to hear from God is that who I am is good enough. If I can just embrace that one thing, then everything else is beauty. On Sunday night, two popes in a movie were the voice of God to me. They convinced a protestant he was good enough.

Click to read Matthew 5: 1-12